What to do if you don’t like your Engagement Ring

Getting an engagement ring you don’t like isn’t the end of the world

Recently, the news was flooded with a story of a bride-to-be slamming the engagement ring her fiancé got her, as the diamond was too small. Now, it's not uncommon to be gifted a piece of jewellery or engagement ring that you're not particularly fond of, but there are ways and means to go about it. The last thing you want to do is hurt your partner's feelings - after all, the proposal isn't really about the engagement ring; it's about your commitment to each other and taking that next step in your relationship. Here's what to do if you don't like your engagement ring. 

Wear the ring for a few days

If you've been given an engagement ring and you're unsure about it, spend a few days wearing the ring to see if it will grow on you. This is super important if you don't wear jewellery all the time - specifically fine jewellery, as you might just need to get used to the fact that you're going to be wearing this particular piece of jewellery all the time. For some, they'll gradually fall in love with the ring!

Does the ring really need to be changed?

Some individuals can move past the fact that they're not truly in love with their ring as it's the symbol that counts. But for others, it's a constant reminder that they don't like the ring, they feel guilty for not liking the ring and it will all fester. You either need to let the guilt and negativity go and live with the ring, or tell your partner you want to change it.

Be honest and open

If you've tried wearing your ring for a few days and it needs to be changed,  you need to sit down with your partner and tell them you're not a fan. Your relationship and marriage should be built on honesty and trust. You need to be honest with each other - even the hard bits. Sit your partner down and explain that while you appreciate the ring, it isn't your style. Remember to broach the subject when you're both in a good spot - don't bring up the fact that you don't like the ring in the middle of an argument. A lot of love, thought and time went into choosing your ring, so you need to acknowledge this, and reinforce that you're not there to hurt your partner's feelings. 

Attempt to come to a compromise 

For some couples, once they've spoken to their partner and have talked through why they chose that ring. The shape of the stone, setting or choice of metal may have been chosen for a very specific reason that makes the ring truly meaningful. Don't be upset if they seem resistant to changing the ring - just try and explain your reasons for doing so, and know what you want to change about the ring before speaking to your partner. If you want to make the change as cheap as possible, you should look at changing the setting and keeping the stones. Alternatively, you could choose a lower value ring. 

If the Ring is inherited 

If you've been given an inherited ring, then make sure you explain to your partner's family that while the gesture is incredible, you feel immense pressure to look after it, which is why you're after something smaller to wear day-to-day. 

If the Ring is store-bought 

Any decent jewellery shop will have a good returns policy (given that the ring is in the original condition it left the store in). Some stores may not offer refunds, but you might be able to swap the ring for one of similar value. You could always look at selling the ring and getting a different one with the money.

If it is a bespoke Ring 

Most jewellers would advise getting the approval of the person wearing the ring before it's signed off. The best way to go about crafting a bespoke ring is by giving a token ring and then getting the custom ring made after. If you are given a custom ring that you don't like, you need to think about whether it's cheaper and easier to get the designer to modify it or sell the ring and buy a new one with the money made. 

At Diamond Heaven, we understand how difficult it can be to pick choose the right engagement ring. If you would like support in selecting the perfect piece of jewellery to gift your partner, contact our team or visit our Birmingham, London, Glasgow, Manchester or Cardiff branch. We are on hand to make your gift buying experience stress free and enjoyable.